let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.