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• (248): View more from Michigan

  Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.

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• (714): View more from California

  we're chasing vodka with high fives

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again

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• 

  You Wouldn’t Guess That These 25 Celebrities Are Complete A**holes

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.

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• (954): View more from Florida

  I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.

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• (207): View more from Maine

  this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!

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• (417): View more from Missouri

  In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.

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• 

  27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (+61): View more from Australia

  I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"

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• (423): View more from Tennessee

  They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.

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• (319): View more from Iowa

  I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.

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• (507): View more from Minnesota

  You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Bouncers are people too...giant angry people

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.

  (616): View more from Michigan

  is that what this stuff is?

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• (707): View more from California

  How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?

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