There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize
