I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
