He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
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