Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
