careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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