I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
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All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
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I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face