I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
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