I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
