There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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