It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Dick very happy bro
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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