There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Randomize
