You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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