Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
