Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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