Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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