Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Holy sore nipples Batman
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
