I don't think brook has ever known best
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Randomize
