It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Randomize
