So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
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