I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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