Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Randomize
