Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
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It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
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I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
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