it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize
