Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
