i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Come see our sink grown plant.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Randomize
