She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
