She said her name was "party"
accomplished twins. life is a go
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
