Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize