I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
