That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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