I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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