Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
