problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Cover your peen. We're going out.
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