I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
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