mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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