FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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