You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
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It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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