From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
