My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize