He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Randomize
