They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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