If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
We had sex on a dog bed..
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
