need another drink. this is the easiest way
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
