Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im holly from the hills drunk
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
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