Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
