ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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