this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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