You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize