I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
