My brain says no but my pants say off.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
don't judge my taste in strippers
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
